Thursday, November 11, 2010

All right....It's Time

Life back to reality has occurred...except for my blogging. I actually am waiting to find all the pictures my deal SIL Mel took when they were here so I can start reminiscing. We took no pictures at all...she took 1000's. And I don't know where they are.

I actually remembered last night to ask Nathan. I was in the kitchen, he was in the office. I yelled from the kitchen, "Where are Mel's pictures?" He mumbled something incomprehensible back. I don't know how many times we've tried office/kitchen conversations, but they don't work. You can't hear a thing from the office. Never. You'd think we would learn, but no, no we don't. And since I was busy working on my new quilt. I wasn't getting up. So that was the end of that. I still don't know where the pictures are. So sorry, it will come one of these days.

I think one of the biggest things that has changed for me that requires no pictures is how I spend our evenings. Mel and I spent countless hours discussing our children, and the world we are raising them in.

I remember back when I was a kid. My dad would come home at 5:30 every day, we'd eat dinner, clean up. By then it was 6:30. That left about an hour before bed time. My dad made the most of that hour. He played a game with me every night, got me a snack, which was very cool. He had the ability to peel an orange in one complete peel so you could put it back together and it looked like a whole hollow orange. Very cool when you're 8...a family skill I should work on perfecting so I can carry it on for another generation. He gave us baths, brushed our teeth, prayed with us and put us to bed. He had an hour a day with us. And he made it count.

My coworker and I were talking the other day. He comes from a family of 7 kids, and was homeschooled for his entire education, so I sort of like to pick his brain about his life, the goods and the bads just so I have an idea of what I'm getting myself into. So after throwing out some jokes, like "Where'd you meet your wife? A homeschool convention?" We got to talking about quality time with kids.

I remembered back to my dad and how I'm sure after a 12 hour day the last thing he wanted to do was deal with us kids at night. But he did, I'm pretty sure he found it a joy, and even if he didn't, I don't remember one night when he didn't act like it was his pleasure to spend every minute with us. I look back at it now and no matter how old I got, he always played a game with me and peeled my orange, and cut my apple. Even when I was of orange peeling age...like 16 or 17. Every night I can remember at least. And as I'm now playing games with my kids, it probably only took him 10-15 minutes out of his night to play a quick game or two. But to me it seemed like hours.

It made me think of how I spend my nights. My kids don't watch any TV during the day so when it gets to 7pm and I'm spent for the day, they get to pop in a movie for a half hour before bed. Mel mentioned her kids don't watch any TV during the week at all. They are in school so by the time they get home, do homework, eat dinner, clean up, bath time....who has time for TV. For me I thought I spend all day with my kids, they don't have homework, and I don't need to bathe them...well sometimes I do I guess :) So really what's a half hour movie at night time?

Quality time, it's all about quality time. Most of my interaction with them is being a teacher, a housekeeper, a laundromat worker, a cook, and my biggest job a referee. How much quality, just for fun time do I spend with them?

So at night time we've started bedtime earlier allowing for family reading time. They all get dressed, teeth brushed and hot on the giant bean bag in our reading corner...that I got especially for times like this, but I've actually never really used! It's currently used a back flip landing mat :) Quaid takes a turn reading a book to all of us, Ava takes a turn, and then Jentzen picks a book for me to read.

Reading is not my favorite thing....actually I really dislike it. It's been my biggest challenge to carve time out of our day for reading time. I think it's really important, but my least favorite...I'd rather sit and do math worksheets with my kids than sit down and read with them.

But there is something about all of us being together, seeing the kids interact together. It's very cool. We did it all last week. It's amazing how it made a difference on our entire day. Our house was just peaceful all day long. The kids played great all day, worked hard on their school, were kind and considerate with each other...not every minute of the day...but noticeably different. I look forward to our nights together...I look forward to reading time. I looked forward to a relaxed, unhurried bedtime. I was amazed at what a just a simple half hour of time makes such a huge difference.

It made movie time on the weekends something to look forward to, something exciting instead of something they were owed every night.

For me it's all about how I will look back on things. What will my kids remember? Will it be that they remember a crabby, tired mom shoving them off to bed every night? Will they remember mom just being a teacher? Will I wish I got to see just one more episode of that TV show? Will I be happy that I missed out on all those night time conversations, kisses, and cuddles. Will I miss watching the kids learn to read together?

We are refocused, relaxed, and content. A good place to be.

3 comments:

Melanie B said...

Amen sister!!! I love those times before bed too where you have those pearler conversations where little things come out of their mouths. Me I am looking forward to the quieter life, a bit like being over there. Quality, quality all the way with no hustle and bustle. Really knowing them & knowing that they know we are there for them & they are a priority. You are doing a great job & we miss you guys sooo much. It is nice to know that our convos didn't just help me!!! (:

Nanna Anne said...

Sounds like fun except I bet your heart was in your mouth for awhile!!!

Nanna Anne said...

The first comment I wrote belonged in the other space.
What a wonderful father you had Karen,i never remember my Dad doing that.
I never liked reading books to the kids,I always fell asleep!!I did do it but I was always glad when their grandma walkington visited cause she always read to them.I did have a scrap book that we did bible verses in every afternoon and we had video times as well,so guess I didn't do too badly as a Mum.

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